Tavern review; Cal's

Eat, drink and get the fuck out

The Happiest Place on Earth. That's the joke around the water cooler at least. I can't pinpoint exactly why I love it - maybe its the Special Export sign out front. Whatever it is, Cal's Tavern, at 400 S Wells (SW corner of Wells and Van Buren) is a south Loop survivor - dozens of these types of joints used to pepper the area. In the 21st century, Cal's is one of those rare joints where bike messengers sit elbow-to-elbow with day traders, homeless alkies, international travelers, and folks of all sorts, sharing $2 cans of Schlitz, PBR and Old Style.

I think Cal's may have recently changed ownership, and abandon their motto of "Eat, drink and get the fuck out", but it still applies. They serve no food, though there is sandwich joint next door that occassional shoves some food thru a hole in the wall. Impossibly small, Cal's now hosts bands (mostly hardcore punk), and boast that they have "400 square feet of rock". The place is so small, bands play ON THE BAR. Another recent improvement is the addition of some plastic resin chairs and tables, so you can enjoy your stink, er, I mean drink, al fesco. There is a liquor store attaches that caters mainly to the alkie crowd - selling pints of all the hard stuff, a wide selection of "bum" wines like MD 20/20 and Wild Irish, as well as single cans of beer. I recently picked up a super sized can of Labatt's for the train at the bargin basement price of $2.

Cal's hours appear to be limited. I've walked by many evenings at 8 pm and the joint is closed. But its got to be the best place in the Loop for those that are serious about a liquid lunch.